Songwriting, Love, Pain and Sociopaths.

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Songwriting.  It’s never come easy for me; I don’t imagine it ever will.  That doesn’t mean I’m going to stop, though.  Sure, I may not write as much or as as quickly as I used to, but at least the songs I do write now have more meaning behind them.  That’s what matters to me – meaning.

As a follower of my music, you will notice that I write a lot about relationships.  Relationships inspire me.  Drama inspires me.  So unless I’m going through drama, I probably won’t be writing much music.  And hey, guess what.  I’m not going through drama, so I haven’t been writing very much. haha

Nowadays, when I just can’t take it anymore and sit down to write a new song, I have to force myself to remember the pain.  That’s an incredibly awesome notion for some people.  People who are heartbroken in any sense would love to get to a point in their lives where they have less pain and  have enough distance from that pain so that effort is required to recollect it.  That’s where I am.  But as a musician, it doesn’t leave me very inspired on a daily basis… not when my forte is writing about heartache and pain.

Someone once told me to write about something everyone could relate to.  I believe the person’s exact words were “the world, politics, everyday struggle”… and went on to say that some people are happy in a relationship, so to stay away from my usual content.  Say what?!  Love is a universal language!  Pain of losing someone you love… unless you’re a sociopath… is something everyone can relate to!

(Let me digress for a moment:  From what little I know, sociopaths still feel pain of loss, just not necessarily the pain of losing someone.  If/when they do feel the pain of losing someone, it’s very short-lived and then they move on without reliving the past.  Fascinating, really.  I’ve known a couple of sociopaths in my time.  You probably have, too – maybe you just weren’t aware of it. I still have a lot to learn about them, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to spend time getting to really know how a sociopath’s mind works.)

Oh right… songwriting.  I started writing in December 2005.  I remember lying in my parent’s spare room during Christmas vacation and listening to Missy Higgin’s debut album that I had recently purchased.  I’m pretty sure “The Special Two” is the song I was listening to when I finally said, “Man, I really need to start writing music.”  I then got out of bed, went to my parent’s computer, hooked up a cheap desktop mic and wrote my first half-verse.  Maybe I’ll post it here someday; not many people have heard it.  I think it ended up being a verse and a chorus – or, at least, what I thought to be a verse and chorus at the time.  haha

Ideally, I’d have enough patience to learn piano or guitar so that my music could sound more like Missy’s.  I don’t see that happening, but you never know what the future may bring.  That being said, I’ll leave you with the song that inspired me to start writing.

“But I will fight for you.  Be sure that I will fight until we’re the special two once again.”

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